ANGER   Laying here listening to my own breathing Hearing the shells explode in the distance Flashes of light reflect hideous shadows of horrors into the sky Hot, no wind blowing and rumbles of exploding bombs in the distance I feel the burning desire to sleep and try to relax Hoping you will enter my slumber And angry that this war is stalking me As I struggle here, I start dreaming of another time far away Laying next to you, I can hear you breathing Watching rain drops kissing our window pane Lightning reflecting shadows of dance onto your skin Cool wind blowing and thunder in the distance I feel the burning desire that you awoke in me You relax on my body and I want to enter your slumber But instead I listen to the rhythmic music of your dreams Angry that time and the dawn was stalking us DAWN ON THE BATTLEFIELD Early dawn, the battle was fierce Smoke is swirling, twirling, damp and gray Surrounding me, taking me into its arms Calling, beckoning, whispering softly It calls to me, drawing me near Telling me I have nothing to fear I follow, listening, feeling Early dawn, the battle finally over Smoke is swirling, twirling, damp and gray Calling me, I feel a presence Reaching out my hand, touching, grasping, Warmth and comfort fill my very being And I know without seeing that I have felt love, I felt you Through the mayhem, smoke and distances you reached me And guided my thoughts to thee Love fills my heart, and my soul become calm Early dawn, the smoke is swirling, twirling, damp and gray Surrounding us, blocking out the horrors of war Bringing peace and love to my soul Bringing me you! DEATH Disturbing shadows, as seen through my teary eyes On this night of fighting, trying not to let you go Desperate thoughts, in the night I cry Please God, he's too young, don't let him go And on this night, even the stars refuse to shine But the flares high in the sky and the bullets continue to fly My pain becomes stronger when life and death combine My eyes search to find comfort from above, and as the moon disappears I feel the death of your spirit and now all hope is gone I must now sacrifice your soul, for if your life is gone Then death is all you and I will ever know. FORGIVENESS Depart you visions of war, bringers of pain Cloaked in isolation, you mock me in harsh disdain My soul is torn beyond repair, I curse the day you entered my brain You pierced my tortured spirit, what horrors I have seen You speak of quiet solitude, to tempt me to act on what might be Then you lanced me in my troubled mind, to the depths of darkness Memories, I beg of you, depart my tortured soul, leave me in peace Someone please help me fight these evil memories of war With all my voice I scream to you, help me through this night once more Help my agonized mind not to heed the demon's call At last, I can no longer stand the terrible pain And I plunge into the shadowy parts of my tormented brain Beckoned by my silent screams, I see an image of someone tall Inviting me to enter Heaven's hall I journey to the light, all in calm, all is quiet I feel a warm touch and I ask for forgiveness with all my might Finally my mind is at peace. A SOLDIER'S THOUGHTS There are many miles between us, this Vietnam war keeps us apart but our hearts see not the distance, we loved each other from the start. Drawing our love even closer, on this our hearts are insistent. When you write my heart sings, I wish you knew the happiness it brings. Just to hear a word from you, keeps my heart from missing you. Longing for the day we greet again; two lonely hearts will then get to sing. I heard your voice on the tape just the other day; so sweet and sexy in every way. I long to hold, to become one; to feel your gentle kiss, your body close to mine. To feel the intensity, oh so strong; longing, wanting you to be mine. I love you truly, yes I do and after this war, I forever want to be with you. KNOWING As I lay here, unsure what has happened to me For not a sound did the bullet make, only a stinging in my chest I reach out for you through the sheath of coming darkness Your spirit is there and yet it evade my grasp I plunge deeper into the darkness I am searching for you now with more haste I stumble among the carnage The pungent stench of despair overwhelms my soul Fear overcomes me now for I feel your spirit dissipating dissipating back into the realm of which it came I call out and my voice echoes loud within my head but I make no audible sound I return from whence I came Knowing now that death is taking me away I am left alone to lay here in the darkness My hope waning, my despair growing Then the darkness fades and there you are Dress in a white gown with bright lights all around You reach out for me and I feel safe in your arms No longer does fear engulf my soul No longer do I feel the burning in my chest I feel a peace that I have never known before Now I can go knowing you are there. NIGHT QUIET In the quiet of this night, after the battle noise is gone As I close my eyes and when in dreams my spirit wanders Our souls find each other and together we go walking til the end of time Hand and hand we share the night as we walk through starlit meadows We pause by a pristine stream and our bodies come together But only in my dreams So I wish for the next battle to be over And as I hurry through each day, I long for sleeps embrace When again our bodies will come together And I can see your face And feel again your sweet lips on mine No more battle noises, no more being alone And when this war is over and I can come home again We can always be together, not only in my dreams But forever through the end of time. PERFECT MOMENT As I sit here in this war torn Vietnam, carnage all around I find you once again, slipping like a wisp of smoke, an indistinct shadow Passing through the dim lit curtains of my mind With eyes closed tight I focus not on the smoke and death But look into the darkness, to find your shape To come close to your smile and to touch your perfect face To immerse myself in you and to prolong this perfect moment To remain locked deep within you, the wondrous dream That's comes to me once more in this place called Vietnam. SPECIAL ANGEL Special Angel come to me In spite of all my misery Lift me from this hollow den Make me whole to love again I didn't ask to go to Vietnam But my country called, so here I am Now that I'm torn up in my mind Please, please don't leave me behind Special Angel do you see All the hope you give me Dreams of us play in my mind In no other's love I'll find Special Angel hear me cry Horrors in my head can't be seen by eye Clean the pain until I'm free I still believe someday, you'll come for me Special Angel I pray it's true Your love will guide and show you how To make me sane again, here and now Months or years I do not care For in my heart, I know, my special Angel will be there. THOUGHTS Through the heat and toil of battle, came thoughts As on an angels wings, softly filtering through the flashes of fire Of those horrid warlike things Thoughts of you, of home, of mother Thoughts that gave new life, new will Thoughts that came so soothing over me Leaving me composed and still Thoughts that make me carry on another day Away from these horrible Vietnam ways. THOUGHTS OF YOU Thoughts of you bring laughter to my soul In this horrible war torn place Thoughts of you make me smile And keeps me from going insane Thoughts of you give me strength To keep going another mile Thoughts of you are what keep me alive When everything looks bad Thoughts of you are what give me hope When my future looks dark and sad Thoughts of you are what I miss When my childish innocence was lost Now I have fewer thoughts of you And those ones may come with a cost But the thoughts of you are all I have They are what keeps me strong And the thoughts of you I can reach Give me the will to carry on In this place, this war torn Vietnam. WAS I THERE It was such a nightmare, horrors all around, but was I there I remember hearing my own breathing and my body ridged with fear As bullets flew pass, singing in my ear It was such a feeling, such a rush, but was I there We fought, some died, we lost friends, brothers We all were brave, we all stood tall, but was I there So many young men, who's names are on this wall They gave their best, they gave their all, but was I there My friends, my brothers, hear me cry, was I there This my soul wishes to know, as my tear begin to flow Was I there with you, why was I spared My names is not listed, was I not there.